If I still love you? I love, I love, yes. I had to keep the love inside me, lock it and forget where I kept the key.
My heart was broken and I needed to breathe.
If I passed this stage you can too. It was not easy, of course, I needed help from friends, a psychologist, and an overwhelming will to overcome. But that was just one of the battles I had to face to be stronger. Had friends who could not take it, I think today, did they really make friends? Today I leave you well below my list. I do not care if they disappear as soon as you’re gone. It makes no difference. I made new friends and strengthened ties that were loosened because I was too focused on one group. Today I’m lighter, in the end, everything has become learning. I remain happy, paying more attention to myself and what I enjoy. Sometimes our memories come, but it does not hurt anymore.
I’ve been thinking a lot about my plans. I’almost finishing my college, I’ve studied a lot and there’s still so much I want to do. I’ve been doing lists of what I want for now, what I’ve done and what I have to do before I actually finish college.
I lived here for 5 years but I still do not Know the city, I went to museums, exhibitions, parties, bars but there is still so much to see. I wanted to learn Italian and French and finally decided to enroll, Italian no yet, I started the Spanish course too, it is not my favorite language but learning is accurate.
I wanted a love ah… This is harder. So I started looking and found it, but I do no think it has yet. I lived here with the following thought, there is no love in São Paulo, and I think this is true, in parts, for a long time I thought it was the rush of the other, but I realized that deep down they do not want to, because it is easier to live without having to give to the other.
So I gave up, I decided they’re going to have to find me now. I did not give up on love, no that, but I’II leave it a while, inside me.